It's been all quiet on the western front as of late as we process some big changes that have happened within our little family - starting with the sudden, devastating loss of our boxer, Morgan.
I wrote something more reflective of her in an attempt to verbalize and come to grips with what was happening during one of the last nights she spent at home with us. I wanted to get it just right while she was still laying next to me. But after she passed and the fullest extent of our grief settled in, I realized those words couldn't adequately express even a fraction of how deeply she was loved, and how critically important she was to us. Our relationship with her was full of such love and respect, any memorial or eulogistic type musings outside our immediate family seemed...feeble. Trivial. After all, no one really knew her as we did, and anything I came up with to explain who she had been in life paled in comparison to what she was, and what she deserves.
I mention her to explain on a more surface level what's brought us from the status quo of a few weeks ago, and through those dark moments to the more hopeful present.
In reflecting on her life during her last week I found one of the best possible versions of myself seemed to be dying along with her. I don't think anyone will deny that humans are infinitely complicated, messy, and flawed creatures. As a result even within the best and most loving of human relationships there are moments of selfishness, anger, judgment and impatience - feelings and impulses dogs wouldn't begin to understand. Emotionally speaking, I've found them to be a much more advanced than us and the selfless love for a dog is one of the best things I have to offer. They are a constant reminder and practice in being a happier, joyful, more loving, and giving person, and generally speaking we need more of that. The idea of who we would be without that canine influence moving forward was salt in the already raw wound of losing our best friend.
In light of this, we decided we didn't want to waste a moment of our future devoid of that particular brand of love and joy Morgan brought to us everyday. And so it is with great pride and hope, that we happily announce the impending arrival our new baby [puppy!] bean. She is the continuation of a 3-generation tradition of female boxers within our family, and we're still searching long and hard for a name that will fit what we've seen of her little personality perfectly.
We are so excited to get to know her, to add her to our life, and experience that puppy love all over again. And we'll begin again, doing everything in our power to be worthy of the affection and devotion this breed gives so freely. Welcome home, baby girl.